Season 6.0 Vol 3: FRESH MEAT!

Last night was Derby Christmas, and someone must've roofied Santa; the Riot Girls made the 'Good' List! Us lucky gals unwrapped 9 fresh MeatHearts that we can't wait to play with!

Join us in welcoming the newest members of the Riot Squad...

Selena Guile, Swiss Army Wife, Sugar Rae,

Golden Snitch, Savage Mind, Meanest Sly Trap,

Justine Timberskate, Great Big C, and Epic Wheel Time!

Welcome to the RadHouse, ladies.

*all photos by Bob Ayers, stolen fair and square from terminalcityrollergirls.com*

Season 6.0 Vol.2: Ch-Ch-Changes.

Us Riot Girls are tuff, you guys know that. We play it close to the vest, and there ain't a lot that'll bring a tear to our eye. Saying goodbye to one of our own is just about the only way to get us to admit to having hearts... let alone that they might be breaking just a little. (Thank your lucky stars we have a blog to admit this stuff, because the first person who tries to talk about "feelings" is gonna get a knuckle sandwich.)

Today is Draft Day, the official start of a new season. But we can't bring on the new without celebrating the... veteran. Last year was the first career season for over half our team, and we wouldn't have made it without such solid players on the bench. Tonight, we'll be drinking a 21 Rum Salute to those who've left for greener pastures.

Skully's moved up to Summerland, where she's skating with the Penticton Pistoleras - and you better believe we're road tripping soon! Percy and Avi left us mid season to focus on their (other) careers, and Ghetto's moved all the way out to the Maritimes to be closer to her family.

Our captain Flux Hellsity hightailed it to Saskatchewan, where they apparently pay electricians ungodly amounts of money (which is of course the only reason anyone would ever choose to live in Saskatchewan.) By all accounts Roxie and Stoli tried to retire last year, but Flux used some sort of magic to bind them for another season. (I'm fairly certain that 'magic' was at least 40 proof.) Last year's crop of Riot Rookies are extremely grateful that whatever bribe she used worked for as long as it did - we could not have done it without them!

Flux, Roxie, and Stoli formed the backbone of our team last season. Despite being injured most of the season, Flux was a motivational force to be reckoned with, and Roxie and Stoli (two founding members of this whole league!) were our leadership on the track. We tried our best to get them back this season, but the beer garden is just calling their names too sweetly. This is definitive proof that there is, indeed, some rest for the wicked.

Once a Riot Girl, always a Riot Girl. Later, Skater.

SEASON 6.0 Vol. 1: All Stars!

2012 is upon us, and TCRG Season 6.0 is barreling towards us like a meteor only Bruce Willis can stop.. and I don't know about you, but I think I'd know if Bruce Willis was around! We have all sorts of announcements, roster changes, and exciting news to share, but we'll try to dish it out to little portions so you don't choke on the awesome! Go grab yourself a friend who knows CPR and have a paper bag ready, because here we go - EXCITING ANNOUNCEMENT #1!

GAH! We're proud as can be that not one... not two... but three of our fellow Soldiers have been drafted to the TCRG All Stars! This is a BIG DEAL. Completely, 100% worthy of Kanye-style caps locking! The All Stars are a super competitive travel team ranked at #23 in the WFTDA! Not bad for their first season as an international competitor!

Sundown and Hittin' Miss will continue to serve with the Riot Girls as Captain and Co-Captain for this term, at least until they somehow manage to unearth the dirt we're blackmailing them with. ShiftKicker, (an All Star vet for every season barring 2010, due to injury) will be skating exclusively for the TCRG. The 2011 RG Roster was very lucky to have a seasoned pro like Shifty on our rookie-heavy rotation, and she'll be greatly missed.

There are a TON of tournaments and games in their season starting February 10 in Eugene, Oregon. The Pacific Northwest region has some pretty awesome derby on offer, and you better believe we'll be cheering for our reassigned Riot Girls like the truly mental fans that we are!

Get to Know Your Riot Girls: The Man with The Plan

And now reppin' the sole Y chromosome on the crew, the guy who's been with our rookies since the first time they laced up with the TCRG. A dude who volunteers his time and runs practices in the freezing cold and the summer heat. At 9 in the morning. Outside. Even when only 5 of us layabouts show up. A dude who's not too cool to do visualization exercises. Ladies and gentlemen, get to know The Man with the Mane... The Suit on the Sidelines... The 'Fro in The Derby Know...

Our Coach, Mr. Laurence Of A Labia!

WHAT'S THE STORY BEHIND YOUR NAME?

No story, I just heard of the film and thought it was funny. Not taken from a Kevin Smith flick.

WHAT'S THE STORY BEHIND YOUR NUMBER?

As a coach I have no number, but if I had time for men's derby, or testosterby, my number would be zero in perentheses (0)

HOW MANY SEASONS HAVE YOU PLAYED?

Coached for 4 seasons or so I think

WHAT POSITION DO YOU PLAY?

Guy on bench yelling at refs and players.

WHAT DREW YOU TO DERBY?

The feminist aspect, and the ass.

WHAT'S YOUR BEST DERBY STORY?

Causing Snatchy to fall on her ass on a cocky breakaway.

WHAT'S THE MOST NON-DERBY THING YOU DO?

I can crochet the f*ck out af a touque, onesy or bikini.

SUPERMAN'S A MILD MANNERED REPORTER. BATMAN'S A MILLIONAIRE PLAYBOY. WHAT'S YOUR SECRET IDENTITY UP TO WHEN YOU HANG UP THE TIGHTS?

Metal fabricator

WHO WOULD PLAY YOU IN THE MOVIE OF YOUR LIFE?

Erik Estrada, Kurt Russell, Matthew McConoughey, Buck Flower, Ray Wise and Tim Meadows would all need to share the role.

A FASHION BLOG WANTS TO DO A SPREAD ON YOUR GAME DAY STYLE. HOW DO YOU DEFINE IT FOR THEM?

That's tough. Almost always has to be a 3 peice, no fucking pleats, and can rarely cost more than $40. "70's trailor serious business funk"

CAN YOU DRAW ME A PICTURE?

Does oragami count?

YOU JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS. WHAT DO YOU DO?

If only that were enough for a down payment on an East Van character house. So robot legs it is.

IF I COULD OPEN UP YOUR BRAIN AND DIRECT DEPOSIT A NEW SKILL, WHAT WOULD YOU CHOOSE?

Vulcan nerve pinch.

DO YOU HAVE A SIGNATURE KARAOKE SONG?

No, well, maybe some Bowie, Ashes to ashes or something recorded in Berlin.

WHAT'S THE BEST PART OF BEING A RIOT GIRL?

We have a tank.

Get to Know Your Riot Girls! Hittin' Miss #MG-42

Here's where Terminal City's Riot Girls answer all of your burning questions! (Questions about your burning should be directed elsewhere.) Got a good one that didn't get covered? Email us!

WHAT'S THE STORY BEHIND YOUR NAME?

Coming up with a name is easy. Getting a name approved is the hard part. On the deadline for name submissions and after having tested at least a dozen at Two Evils with no success, I was on a teleconference at work when my Director used the expression "hit and miss". Voila. A little play on the words and it was mine.

WHAT'S THE STORY BEHIND YOUR NUMBER?

Better brush up on your history.

HOW MANY SEASONS HAVE YOU PLAYED?

Just wrapping up the first!

WHAT POSITION DO YOU PLAY?

Jammer primarily, but I'll do anything.

WHAT DREW YOU TO DERBY?

Oh so many things! I'm a washed up jock, so mostly the athletic challenge, but the action packed technicolour ruckus of it all was a definite pull as well. Motley Crusade-her once described derby as what happens when the jocks, the gay girls and the punk rockers get together and make up a game. Who in their wrong mind could resist?!

WHAT'S YOUR BEST DERBY STORY?

I'll plead the fifth on that one.

WHAT'S THE MOST NON-DERBY THING YOU DO?

I guess it's a toss up between curl and can.

SUPERMAN'S A MILD MANNERED REPORTER. BATMAN'S A MILLIONAIRE PLAYBOY. WHAT'S YOUR SECRET IDENTITY UP TO WHEN YOU HANG UP THE TIGHTS?

I work for a funding agency that supports research in science and engineering.

WHO WOULD PLAY YOU IN THE MOVIE OF YOUR LIFE?

If it can't be me and Tank Girl isn't available, it would have to be the honey badger.

CAN YOU DRAW ME A PICTURE?

Yup, but I'd rather bake you a cake.

YOU JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS. WHAT DO YOU DO?

Pay off a few bills, take a vacation, make a few investments for the long term and then start looking into that apartment in Paris I always wanted...You Soldiers of Awesome don't mind skating on the champ de mars, do you?

IF I COULD OPEN UP YOUR BRAIN AND DIRECT DEPOSIT A NEW SKILL, WHAT WOULD YOU CHOOSE?

Fluency in every language.

DO YOU HAVE A SIGNATURE KARAOKE SONG?

Lucky for you, no. My singing will make your ears bleed, but I can work a mic like nobody's business.

IF YOU HAD A PERSONALIZED MARTIAL ART, WHAT WOULD IT BE CALLED?

Mega-pow!

WHAT'S THE BEST PART OF BEING A RIOT GIRL?

Gestalt, my friend, gestalt.

Get to Know Your Riot Girls! Hurt Russell #46

Here's where Terminal City's Riot Girls answer all of your burning questions! (Questions about your burning should be directed elsewhere.) Got a good one that didn't get covered? Email us!

WHAT'S THE STORY BEHIND YOUR NAME?

I kind of love Kurt Russell. Capital 'L', I admit it. He's played some of the most amazing characters of our time! But, no matter how far I tried to take a pun, I couldn't come up with a derby-ized version of any of 'em that hadn't already been taken. I was lamenting this sad fact to a good buddy of mine, when he blurted it out. Talk about a *facepalm* moment. How'd I miss that?! Lesson learned: never leave home without a comedy writer.

SPEAKING OF KURT RUSSELL... SNAKE PLISSKEN AND RJ MACREADY IN A WRESTLING MATCH. WHO WINS?

EVERYONE PRESENT. EVERYONE.

WHAT'S THE STORY BEHIND YOUR NUMBER?

46 is the official body count of Big Trouble In Little China (one of the Holy Trinity of Kurt Russell movies.)

HOW MANY SEASONS HAVE YOU PLAYED?

7/8ths of one. Newbie Newberson over here.

WHAT POSITION DO YOU PLAY?

A lady never discloses! Wait.. What? Oh. My bad, I'm not wearing my glasses. Uh... I'll find out on game day, but I really dig blocking right now. (Read: I'm tired of being a human pinball for now, but I'll revisit jamming again in the future.)

WHAT DREW YOU TO DERBY?

I ended up taking a couple friends to watch my buddy Amazombie in the home opener last season. I had no freakin' idea what was going on, but I knew I wanted in. I had made a conscious decision earlier in the year to do something just for me, busy myself up a little. Holy crap - be careful what you wish for!

WHAT'S YOUR BEST DERBY STORY?

It ain't the best, but it's G rated ;) When I decided to give it a go, I had to find a pair of skates.

I wasn't ready to get a full rig yet (not knowing if I'd even dig it) and you try finding a pair of Craigslist derby skates in size 'midget'. I tried out for the TCRG in rollerskates my buddy Eden'd been holding on to since she was 9 years old.

WHAT'S THE MOST NON-DERBY THING YOU DO?

I'm addicted to terrible/awesome SyFy television shows. I embroider portraits of Will Ferrell as Robert Goulet. I read comic books under the bedsheets to hide from the website I'm trying to build... (I'm almost positive the internet is run by evil sorcerers, and I fear that Wordpress may be sentient and feeding on my fear.)

SUPERMAN'S A MILD MANNERED REPORTER. BATMAN'S A MILLIONAIRE PLAYBOY. WHAT'S YOUR SECRET IDENTITY UP TO WHEN YOU HANG UP THE TIGHTS?

I run The Dreadquarters, a salon on Commercial Drive that specializes in dreadlocks and other

off-the-wall hair. No big deal, just the coolest gig ever...

WHO WOULD PLAY YOU IN THE MOVIE OF YOUR LIFE?

Rodney Dangerfield!

CAN YOU DRAW ME A PICTURE?

Not really, but you asked so nicely! Here's a non-artistic rendering I did of Ozzy Osbourne, delighted as a small child with his foam cannon. (It was a weird show.)

YOU JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS. WHAT DO YOU DO?

I buy an abandoned summer camp and move in with all my buddies. We fortify against the coming (insert-your-favourite-end-times-here) and host Metalocalypse Karaoke in the mess hall on Tuesdays. I wouldn't even have to worry about investing any of that cool mil - I'll just wait for the reality shows to come knocking! (It's good to have a backup plan.)

IF I COULD OPEN UP YOUR BRAIN AND DIRECT DEPOSIT A NEW SKILL, WHAT WOULD YOU CHOOSE?

This is great, because I love to know things! I just hate learning them. Sucking at stuff is for the birds! So, I would like to be instantly good at the following:

a) driving. (If you'd like to do a sister a solid, feel free to email!)

b) fly fishing

c) dungeons and dragons

DO YOU HAVE A SIGNATURE KARAOKE SONG?

I'm currently working on mastering the key change in Bon Jovi's classic "Livin' On a Prayer". Once I get that locked tight, you're gonna have to fight me off the stage. I'm taking that sh*t on the road, Duets styles. (Huey Lewis shout-out!)

WHAT'S THE BEST PART OF BEING A RIOT GIRL?

I'm pretty sure I could call on one of these girls to second me in a knife fight just as easily as I could ask 'em to take me to Costco. Pretty sure...

Get to know your Riot Girls! Cassandra Pain #99

Here's where Terminal City's Riot Girls answer all of your burning questions! (Questions about your burning should be directed elsewhere.) Got a good one that didn't get covered? Email us!

WHAT'S THE STORY BEHIND YOUR NAME?

Choosing a name is incredibly difficult. I wanted something that was fun and meant something to me. Batman is my favourite comic bookcharacter/superhero but I'm a girl so I didn't want to use anything Batman related. I moved onto Batgirl. My favourite Batgirl is Cassandra Cain (raised mute to use the language parts of her brain tounderstand/predict body language). I changed Cain to Pain and Cassandra Pain was born.

WHAT'S THE STORY BEHIND YOUR NUMBER?
Cassandra Cain became Batgirl in 1999. Shortened it to 99.

HOW MANY SEASONS HAVE YOU PLAYED?
This is my rookie year!

WHAT POSITION DO YOU PLAY?
Wherever they put me. I'm working on learning the positions and where I play best.

WHAT DREW YOU TO DERBY?
A friend of mine (Iona Beerwagon – Faster Pussycats) plays and I'd always been interested. I saw the season opener last year and was hooked. I bought my skates a few weeks later and joined up with some other derby hopefuls (now organized and full of more awesome – RawMeat) to practice for tryouts! I've never liked traditional sports.I'm always drawn to less mainstream activities, and I HATE working out, so it has to be fun. Thus, I play roller derby.

WHAT'S YOUR BEST DERBY STORY?
There are too many to break it down to just one. One of my favourites was when I was jamming and broke out of the pack. I looked into the stands and saw my Monster cheering like a crazy person. That was pretty awesome.

WHAT'S THE MOST NON-DERBY THING YOU DO?
I'm not sure I understand the question. Is being a mom non-derby? Because I have my very own 5 year old Monster.

SUPERMAN'S A MILD MANNERED REPORTER. BATMAN'S A MILLIONAIRE PLAYBOY.WHAT'S YOUR SECRET IDENTITY UP TO WHEN YOU HANG UP THE TIGHTS?
If I told you I'd have to kill you ;)

SPEAKING OF BATMAN... YOU'RE ALONE IN THE BATCAVE. SECURITY'S DOWN, ALFRED'S ON A COFFEE BREAK, AND THERE'S NO WAY YOU'LL BE CAUGHT. WHAT DO YOU DO?

Take the Batmobile for a spin of course! Who doesn't want to drive theBatmobile?!

WHO WOULD PLAY YOU IN THE MOVIE OF YOUR LIFE?
Oh who knows... I've been told I look like Darryl Hannah...

CAN YOU DRAW ME A PICTURE?
Can I? Yes. Will it look good? No.

YOU JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS. WHAT DO YOU DO?
Everyone else has already said it, but buy the TCRG a new home. Travel the world (in the off season of course!). After that I'd spend mymoney on a new house complete with a comic room full of shiny new comics.

IF I COULD OPEN UP YOUR BRAIN AND DIRECT DEPOSIT A NEW SKILL, WHAT WOULD YOU CHOOSE?
Can I choose time/space travel? Because that'd be awesome!

DO YOU HAVE A SIGNATURE KARAOKE SONG?
Not so much. I'm up for making a fool of myself with whatever comes up!

WHAT'S THE BEST PART OF BEING A RIOT GIRL?

The amazing group of women I get to play and work with. Everyonebrings something different to the table and we're all super supportiveof each other. I've never played team sports so I feel super lucky tohave such a wonderful team!!