Here's where Terminal City's Riot Girls answer all of your burning questions! (Questions about your burning should be directed elsewhere.) Got a good one that didn't get covered? Email us!
WHAT'S THE STORY BEHIND YOUR NAME?
I kind of love Kurt Russell. Capital 'L', I admit it. He's played some of the most amazing characters of our time! But, no matter how far I tried to take a pun, I couldn't come up with a derby-ized version of any of 'em that hadn't already been taken. I was lamenting this sad fact to a good buddy of mine, when he blurted it out. Talk about a *facepalm* moment. How'd I miss that?! Lesson learned: never leave home without a comedy writer.
SPEAKING OF KURT RUSSELL... SNAKE PLISSKEN AND RJ MACREADY IN A WRESTLING MATCH. WHO WINS?
EVERYONE PRESENT. EVERYONE.
46 is the official body count of Big Trouble In Little China (one of the Holy Trinity of Kurt Russell movies.)
HOW MANY SEASONS HAVE YOU PLAYED?
7/8ths of one. Newbie Newberson over here.
WHAT POSITION DO YOU PLAY?
A lady never discloses! Wait.. What? Oh. My bad, I'm not wearing my glasses. Uh... I'll find out on game day, but I really dig blocking right now. (Read: I'm tired of being a human pinball for now, but I'll revisit jamming again in the future.)
WHAT DREW YOU TO DERBY?
I ended up taking a couple friends to watch my buddy Amazombie in the home opener last season. I had no freakin' idea what was going on, but I knew I wanted in. I had made a conscious decision earlier in the year to do something just for me, busy myself up a little. Holy crap - be careful what you wish for!
WHAT'S YOUR BEST DERBY STORY?
It ain't the best, but it's G rated ;) When I decided to give it a go, I had to find a pair of skates.
I wasn't ready to get a full rig yet (not knowing if I'd even dig it) and you try finding a pair of Craigslist derby skates in size 'midget'. I tried out for the TCRG in rollerskates my buddy Eden'd been holding on to since she was 9 years old.
I'm addicted to terrible/awesome SyFy television shows. I embroider portraits of Will Ferrell as Robert Goulet. I read comic books under the bedsheets to hide from the website I'm trying to build... (I'm almost positive the internet is run by evil sorcerers, and I fear that Wordpress may be sentient and feeding on my fear.)
SUPERMAN'S A MILD MANNERED REPORTER. BATMAN'S A MILLIONAIRE PLAYBOY. WHAT'S YOUR SECRET IDENTITY UP TO WHEN YOU HANG UP THE TIGHTS?
I run The Dreadquarters, a salon on Commercial Drive that specializes in dreadlocks and other
off-the-wall hair. No big deal, just the coolest gig ever...
WHO WOULD PLAY YOU IN THE MOVIE OF YOUR LIFE?
Rodney Dangerfield!
CAN YOU DRAW ME A PICTURE?
Not really, but you asked so nicely! Here's a non-artistic rendering I did of Ozzy Osbourne, delighted as a small child with his foam cannon. (It was a weird show.)
YOU JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS. WHAT DO YOU DO?
I buy an abandoned summer camp and move in with all my buddies. We fortify against the coming (insert-your-favourite-end-times-here) and host Metalocalypse Karaoke in the mess hall on Tuesdays. I wouldn't even have to worry about investing any of that cool mil - I'll just wait for the reality shows to come knocking! (It's good to have a backup plan.)
IF I COULD OPEN UP YOUR BRAIN AND DIRECT DEPOSIT A NEW SKILL, WHAT WOULD YOU CHOOSE?
This is great, because I love to know things! I just hate learning them. Sucking at stuff is for the birds! So, I would like to be instantly good at the following:
a) driving. (If you'd like to do a sister a solid, feel free to email!)
b) fly fishing
c) dungeons and dragons
DO YOU HAVE A SIGNATURE KARAOKE SONG?
I'm currently working on mastering the key change in Bon Jovi's classic "Livin' On a Prayer". Once I get that locked tight, you're gonna have to fight me off the stage. I'm taking that sh*t on the road, Duets styles. (Huey Lewis shout-out!)
WHAT'S THE BEST PART OF BEING A RIOT GIRL?
I'm pretty sure I could call on one of these girls to second me in a knife fight just as easily as I could ask 'em to take me to Costco. Pretty sure...
I think you may now be my favourite Riot Girl. This profile is so much win.
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